Sometimes we feel no one will understand us, or even worse you fear getting misjudged. These oceans of self-analyzing thoughts, trying to figure out why all this is happening; make us unable to even understand ourselves either sometimes. When we can’t figure ourselves out, how will others understand us? These are problems of Orthodox Families.
I have been such a kid who does not like to speak much; I feel I am vulnerable for people to give their judgments on me, to avoid this situation I chose to be less interactive and try to escape from gatherings.
But society never fails to impress us, even this behavior of mine was and is still thoroughly judged. I am considered arrogant, or good for nothing.
I feel it is tough for girls like me, to share what do they feel. The constant fear of being misjudged by some strong-headed person haunts us.
In a society where we come from(orthodox families) is different for us to show some uncommon interests, which are quite common but uncommon for the society we live in. Like maybe If you want to visit a coffee shop it is sure for us to hear remarks like”ooh maybe she went to see some guy”. It is high time to get her married or else she will be out of our hands.
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It is just not about visiting a coffee shop, maybe you want to go out to persuade your higher studies, you want to go for a job. The way you dress, you speak, you react is everything is being eyed upon.
It becomes hard for girls who have seen a healthy environment at an early age, but as you enter your teens you are restricted.
And that is what I went through. I chose to be quiet. I kind of accepted my life to be controlled by others.
But sometimes that rebellious nature shows its presence and takes over your controlled self and you have no more fear of losing anything because you have been to a point where you realized you lost yourself. So you feel, I have seen the worst, what more would I face. Same misjudgments. I fear no more now. When I did nothing I was misjudged, now I’ll do what I feel is good for me.
I know it may sound a little offensive, but it is your family who can make you or break you sometimes. Conservative families in most cases put you down unknowingly. They have so much societal pressure. To fulfill their interests of being honored with the tag of respectable families. Someone has indeed said true, if your family supports you no matter what, no society has the right to point fingers at you.
read, How to strengthen the father-daughter bond
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It does not in any way means that we don’t respect our elders and love our parents. We just want to be understood and not misjudged even if we misalign sometimes with your thoughts.
How beautiful would the world be, if people hear you out without giving their judgment? Sometimes you just want someone to understand you without asking for any validation. Judgments are important in certain situations but not always.
Time has changed so our environment. It has no point in following the monolithic rules of society which are not valid in this generation. I feel society lacks acceptance. They should learn to open their hearts and accept people without giving unnecessary validations. Everyone has something special to give if society is open to receive it.
One Life. Live Boundless.
Also read, Dealing with Cousins and Siblings
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